26 April 2010

we interrupt this program...






I love the photo above. Clearly I didn't take it as I am the lucky girl being kissed by the wonderful french cheese man. I want a cheese man. I need a cheese man!


Life is settling into it's regular ebb and flow now that I have been back for nearly a week. Has it really only been 5 days? It feels a lifetime ago, and yet, it is still right here - close to the surface. I have been doing a lot of thinking since my return. I actually started reassessing parts of my life while I was away. It seems easier sometimes, to really *look* at your life when you are temporarily removed from it. It is an odd thing because it is like seeing it from a strangers perspective and yet somehow, you have insiders knowledge at the same time. Confusing? Yes, well, if you think it is confusing, try being me!

One thing that I have been ruminating on continually since my return is my photography and where I want to go with it. As I live in my head much of the time, as well as the fact that I am COMPLETELY type-A, this is causing me to obsess a bit... You see, while I love the idea of being a bohemian photographer - wandering the planet, shooting what inspires me, and supporting it all by harvesting the money tree that grows on our little farm, the truth is, I need to actually focus and turn this crazy full-time hobby into something more. I need to somehow figure out what it is that drives me - what makes me feel so passionate about it - where I want it to go. The problem is it is far easier for me to say what I DON'T want to do with it than it is to figure out what it is that I DO want. Have I mentioned that I am fairly certain I have ADHD...?

Sooo.... My husband is away for the next nine days and I am hoping to take that time to really start to organize all of the thoughts and ideas that are currently running helter skelter in my head. I am incredibly blessed to be surrounded by some of the most inspiring, creative, driven photographers and artists out there, and some of them I consider my dearest friends. I am not shy about pulling them into all of this to help me figure it out. I need them. Truly.

I am also ALWAYS open to feedback, advice, input, etc. from any and all of you. One of the most difficult things that I find in all of this is seeing yourself from the "outside". I think that I, like many people, tend to be quite self-critical and thus, find it easier to see what it is that I don't like about my work than what I do like. And while you are all SO. INCREDIBLY. NICE. with all of your wonderful words and compliments, I am actually really looking for advice on a very practical level.

Paris, jour trois shall be here, hopefully tomorrow if I can get enough photo editing done. Sometimes I begin to work on it, and then become lost in the wonderful memories of it all~

xx

46 comments:

Melissa Miller said...

all are such fantastic photos from your trip. ~Gorgeous! :)

sharon said...

I keep popping in to look at your Paris photos, and always smile. I only live an hour from Paris but somehow you make it look more fun, discovering it with your girlfriend.
I'm not a photo expert, but I've always loved and admired the photos you use for your blog header.
Sharon

Rhonda said...

I just found your wonderful blog and I wish I had some inspiring and practical words for you. I do know writing everything down in your head helps so much. I do it all the time and keep a creative thought journal near me at all times.

Love your photos Love your blog!

Privet and Holly said...

The fact that you are RUMINATING about your future shows that you are ready to take the next step. Your photos have been VERY inspiring to me; so much so that my husband bought me a camera for my b-day and I'm now searching out photography classes. Would you ever consider teaching....or writing a practical book about photography {something for bloggers, perhaps? in easy to absorb and follow language?} Or, do you want to do freelance photo-journalism, where you take shots that speak to you and then submit them for consideration? I think the photo world is your oyster.....GO out and FIND your pearl! xx P&H

Liz Bradley said...

Love this picture too! Love your blog, and have Loved hearing about Paris.
Liz
http://mylovelylittlelulu.blogspot.com/

Abigail said...

I'm a lurker. . .anyway, I just want to say that that photo brought a much needed smile to my day! It just radiates such a joyful happy moment!!

A-M said...

Just blogged about this the other day: http://thehousethata-mbuilt.blogspot.com/2010/04/pep-talk.html. Just do it..... your photography is unique and beautiful... you are so talented and full of life...be totally bold and live it! A-M xx

The domestic novice said...

I am so with you on the working out what I'm passionate about and where it will take me. It's so hard pinning down, and focusing on, just one thing. Good luck! I'm finding it quite tough, although endless list writing is helping...

Loving the photo - am off to Paris on the 22nd. Can't wait!

Cat x

HeddyShea said...

How exciting that you are moving forward with your passion! I struggle with that all the time... not knowing how to zero in- and where to start. I'm so proud of you for recognizing it's time to take the next step. It's easier to continue on the same path- your courageous for moving forward. Go for it friend!
xo
SHS

Cape Cod Rambling Rose said...

Such fabulous photos of your trip! I think I want a cheese man, too!

Raised In Cotton said...

About three years ago I decided like you to take my photography hobby more serious and it was probably one of the best things I have ever done for my creative heart:) So just finding your blog (where have I been) I would say follow your photography passion and the rest will be easy because you certainly have the talent:)))

Blessings,
Raised In Cotton~Carol
http://raisedincotton.typepad.com

Martha said...

what a wonderful picture!!!
Just from meeting you...I know you would be great at what you set your mind to.
I almost think you know where you do want to go...sometimes it is hard to see that it will truly happen...just don't talk yourself out of it.
but I know you are successful already Kim...just believe that about yourself...being type-A myself..I think when we are removed from our life to help us reengergize and refocus and figure our goals/dreams out...it is not the excitement we feel about it while we make the decision...but do we still do it when the initial excitement wears off or when it gets hard or when we hit a bump?...do we still believe it will happen?
That's my issue ~ but just something I heard about a month ago ~ we have to have the passion and ache for it ~ the will to see it through months...years down the road when we come home

You'll be fantastic wherever you want to take it!

Kasey said...

i tell you...those damn money tree's!
I'm loving the cheese man...
xo

DustyLu said...

Wow, I can relate! It is hard to put your passion into something you feel is bigger. We are our own worst critics. You photography is what drove me to want to learn. Your eye for art is what made me want to photograph. Although I am not even close, I hope that with your inspiration and commitment to your passion, I too can do the same..You have inspired me to want to see the world threw lense. You have done that for alot of people, maybe teaching it would be fun. I just wanted to say, with out sounding to kiss butt, lol. Your very talented beyond measure. Take it to the limit and don't look back. We aspire to be like you. Taking us with you is a blessing for us, inspiration is what you share! Keep it coming! ~lulu

Ange said...

JUST DO IT! Sounds great to me. And of course - if it doesn't work out, you have a mentor who can teach you the art of selling cheese and seduction!
Bloody good photo that ;-)
With your type A personality you are a natural for sitting down and organising what you want down to the last perfect detail. WRITE DOWN EACH GOAL!
It will make it clear in your own head
Forget about France - that the Sky's the limit!
xx

robinbird said...

i'll take a cheese man too...were there extras over there in france? i bet there were. i know he felt as lucky as you look like you feel.you really are a romantic. France suits you.

the other topic..... photography. what is it that will drive you to find your true voice and know what to do with it? i think that the question itself is the answer. if you can keep the question alive you will already be traveling towards your destiny...it's when we stop asking or think we know something that we block ourselves on the road. i have read a book that i love with all my heart named Callings by Greg Levoy. i suggest it to clients all the time and they always return to me being inspired by this beautiful book.

picture journeys...i wrote to tiff and tentatively said sometime in june .... she also says she cannot wait to hear about France! an old fashioned slideshow perhaps?? :)
XO

Amy'svintagecottage said...

Aw Kim,The proof is in the pudding! I think you just need to stay on your path and follow your dreams! The inspiration you have given to so many including myself is wonderful!
xoxo
Amy

blah said...

ha- your in exactly the place i have been for a while. figuring out a focus for my work. and what i actually find is really helpfull is just honest un-sugercoated feedback. i'll admit that i have not seem a holistic body of your work, but of the stuff that i have seen what strikes me as remarkable is your way of framing the ordinary into something utterly charming. i would go so far as to say your work reminds me of how people idealize their childhood. faded, sometimes blurred, and usually fixating on a small particular thing that others would pass over. much in the way that a child notices details that grownup eyes never catch. you are very very good at this.

Lori said...

I know it is easier to look at things at home while you are away from it all ~ better yet while you were on your wonderful trip and had some alone time. Kim I think you truly have a gift ~ your photography is gorgeous and I have told you before that you inspire me to do better and be a better person. Whatever you choose to pursue I know you will do it with your whole heart and be a success at it. xo

Kerri said...

I have goosebumps after reading this post - you've just described perfectly how I'm feeling at the moment, and you put it so eloquently.
I find it really hard to commit to just one area of ceativity, but I fear without some clear focus, I tend to plan a lot and achieve not so much! I'm now an avid follower of your lovely blog, and look forward to seeing more of your gorgeous work. K xx

Shelly said...

When I went to Europe for the first time, about 7 years ago, I have to say that I came home with new ideas about my life. What I was doing and NOT doing. I think seeing other cultures and a bigger "History" helps us to put things into perspective, and hopefully we GROW as a result!!

This IS a perfect time for you to reevaluate and rethink your life! Advice is great, but if you listen to that little voice in YOUR head, I think you will find the right path!

(I'm having a giveaway over on my blog which I posted on Friday, if you want to stop over and say "bonjour.")

Adieu!
Shell

Lauralee said...

Wedding photography is where its at if you want practical advice. Have a nice day.

Debby said...

This is a great post and the photo is beautiful. I always enjoy visiting your blog and seeing all your beautiful creativity. I am not one to answer as I have the same discussion with myself weekly. I just know that I have put things off and lost a couple of great opportuniteis to do exactly what I want to. I am now trying to get brave and move ahead with my thoughts and dreams. I know the right answer will come to you at the exact perfect time.
Debby

Privet and Holly said...

Hi Kim! I DO have an e-mail but am waiting until I get home to add a picture to it on my sidebar. It is privetandholly@gmail.com. I see that everyone else CONCURS with my feelings about your photography. Sometimes it takes a trip and stepping outside of our normal lives to find clarity about the future. I used to live in Hinsdale, Illinois, but now live in another Midwest State. I'd love to chat sometime....send me an e-mail when you get a moment! xx P&H

A Gift Wrapped Life said...

Love the cheese guy pic. So fun and a priceless Paris pic for you. Hey, everyone stuggles witht he same questions and path when you live in a creative world and just so you know, it does ever stop. Make a plan, make a list, and make it happen and then make changes as you go. You know you can do this. Sometimes baby steps are better though, take this lovingly from somewhere who has been through a few of them. Much love XO

lisaroy said...

I have been enjoying your photos of Paris - I've been 3 times but never in spring so it's lovely to see it through your eyes.
I truly understand how difficult it is to find your focus - I recently gave up my day job to make handbags full time and am still trying to wrap my brain around it. I now understand how my mother felt when she retired - it took her quite a long time to accept the fact that her day job was over and now it was time to figure out what she wanted to do with the rest of her life.
It may take you quite a while to figure it out but you've got amazing talent which is the first step. It can lead you anywhere you want to go so give yourself some time and it WILL come to you. And surrounding yourself with other creative people will eventually focus your passion and lead you down the right path.
love your blog!!

Kathrine said...

Hi Kim,

You are sooo cute!!! Did you get some free cheese? :)

So I would love my daughter to be one of your first clients when you decide. Maybe a photo shoot at BH?!

red ticking said...

first of all... you are so beautiful...love the photo and my adv... GO FOR IT!!! follow your heart... you will never look back... xoxo

i have been away so i need to read up on your trip!

A Refocused Life said...

The travel log photos are wonderful. You have a great start - it's obvious that you have a creative talent. I'm not sure the direction you are thinking, but one of my favorite photographic bloggers is Julie at Being Ruby - Beingruby.blogspot.com. Her work is amazing. Follow your passion.

Have a wonderful week. Rita

Heidi said...

Hi!
I know what you are going through (I think I do...). Re-assessing is hard, seeing myself is hard. It's always easier to critique the other person, and come up with amazing solutions to their problems, bad hair, poor choice of clothing, obvious wrong decisions etc...but for me to find the anwers for myself it's not so easy. And even when I hear things others say, I don't always believe they are talking about me!! So...with that in mind: just take your time, and try whatever strikes your fancy. Don't try to be perfect,don't try to figure it all out right away, and don't try to force an answer. And you know what? Something will happen and you'll get there eventually! (Now,I will try to follow my own advice, cause I, too am struggling with these kinds of decisions....) Good luck!
XO
Heidi - Heart and Home
my word verification is aceph, which I will take to mean "accept". Deep, huh?

Dustjacket Attic said...

That photo is totally darling, really. I think the one below this in the previous post is magnificent. I just had to check out your posts on Paris then go over to your friend and check out her account too. So lucky.

My best wishes on working out what your goals and aims will be.

hugs DJ

FrenchBlue said...

All I know is you are adorable, you are a beautiful writer and a photographer. I also know that whatever it is, you will follow your heart with your passions to the highest mountian and will suceed. Sometimes just go with it don't think too much about it. You will be led to the answer and you must trust that.
XO

koralee said...

Thank you for visiting me the other day...your blog is so lovely and your images are perfect in everyway...sigh..I so need to get my act together and figure out my photoshop .....I have had it in my computer for awhile ...I think I need lessons. Hugs to you for a productive week. xoxo

Tinka said...

I think you have really talent, you sholud follow your heart, it is the best way!
Best wishes
Tinka
(I reflect about a new way, too...)

Dreamy Whites said...

Dear Kimberly,
YOu are a very talented person. I love your work, and think you are so talented. I am not just saying that either. I can't tell you how much I love my cupcake print and can hardly wait for you to open your etsy site again! : )))) I think God gave you a special talent and you inspire all of us in so many ways!!! GO FOR IT
Take Care,
Maria
p.s. You have no idea how much your comment you left on my blog meant to me. Thank You so much It made my day!!!

ZAIRA said...

I totally understand you! You are very talented on photography, you deserve to think GREAT!! I am very inspired by your photos, they're so charming, they really have something more.... Hope you can make your thoughts clear and let us know what you decided to do....

Amanda said...

I remember when I gave up my 'day job' (read long-studied for quite lucrative career) in order to really explore my creative side and open my store. It was the scariest thing I've ever done and I was so scared of failing. But if I can offer any advice - feel scared and do it anyway. Write down all your goals and find a way to make them happen. You won't regret it!

chickie said...

I can totally relate to the way you feel about direction in your life.I am tossing thoughts as well about the path in my life.Which to take ?? Reading your feelings in your post over and over is making me think to get on track and do it.Find that path.Thank-you for making the time and sharing your feelings.Looking forward to hearing and see more inspiring posts.Chickie from chickievintagechic.blogspot.com

red ticking said...

went thru the photos of your trip...they are amazing... just love them... aaahhhh esp pate, cornichons, saami and wine.... yummie xx

Anita said...

Hmmm. I know EXACTLY what you mean. Pictures are great. You lov everything about it. Cash is great. Pictures needs to equal cash. Not being a photographer, I can't help you there. There is always the "do it and the money will follow" advice- but that won't likely be next week in the line at the grocery...Hoping for a big break for you- seems like creative woman are GREAT about lifting each other up- or getting them into the picture... prayers as you ruminate....

MODERN Prairie Girl said...

Hey, sweetness...so glad you're home safe and sound and that you had a mind-blowing good time.

I KNEW this trip would bring on some deep thinking...
It's a good thing, my love, because you have been wrestling with the photography questions for awhile now...

...time to sort it out.

You know I'm always here as a sounding/shooting board :)

I cherish our friendship!
oxoxox
L
p.s. the shots you got are so lovely...feels like I'm there.

Kristin said...

Oh my goodness I love that picture of you and the french cheese man. Adorable and you sparkle in that image. So glad your trip was really so very good in company you kept and everything that has to do with Paris!

paperbird said...

I totally missed out on the wonderful cheese man!


Your images are so beautiful.

Teresa said...

When you get it all figured out, let me know! I'm in the same place, pondering the very same things. So much to consider.
Your trip looks like it was absolutely divine. Can't wait to see more! It's good to be home though, isn't it?

Teresa Sheeley said...

I am really enjoying the photography you shot on your trip; it is all so inspiring and makes me feel like any dream is possible!! :)

I am not a brave girl, so reading yours and Kasey's adventure just filled me with a longing to better myself. Someday I will be a brave girl too. :)

Thanks for sharing your journey.

Teresa

Christina said...

this photo makes me smile.
x